The myths related to retirement are many. This was the theme of a short talk I made to my Business Breakfast Club networking group this morning. And as I went through a short list of some of the most prevalent ones there some knowing nods amongst those who had friends or family who'd retired ...but many eyebrows raised in surprise as this group comprised largely of baby boomers began to connect with the retirement myths they were living from.

Perhaps the one they had thought about least was the myth that retirement is an "event", when the reality is that retirement is a process. My friends and colleagues with whom I've been meeting weekly for a decade were stunned to realize that for many retirement will be thrust upon them, rather than be something they've anticipated or planned for. They were further surprised to learn that involuntary retirement happens to roughly twice as many Canadian women as men.

Why's that, they puzzled. Largely for two reasons was my response. Women populate many of the most volatile jobs in the Western economy. Positions in retail, customer services, admin: many of which are part-time and subject to higher rates of downsizing and layoffs than other sectors of the economy. Secondly, women are still considered to be the caretakers of relationships in our culture. When aging parents become ill or unable to take care of themselves, it is more likely for women to leave the workforce in order to provide the care they need.

They were also pretty shocked to discover that the average age at which women in Canada become widowed is 55. For many of these women, whatever retirement plans they had fly right out of the window as they face a life on their own instead of within a partnership, frequently in reduced financial situations.

On the up side they were pleased to discover that our pre-retirement obsession with having enough money for retirement doesn't impact our experience of retirement. Recent studies have shown that amongst people who are already retired, money is 4th on their list of what's important for a happy retirement: health, relationships and rewarding activities are all more important to the quality of life we experience in retirement than is money. So take heart all you folks who are worried that despite your best efforts you still don't have enough squirrelled away. If you focus on staying healthy, building and maintain satisfying relationships and develop activities that feel rewarding for you you can still have a great retirement experience.

I felt good as I wrapped up my little talk, knowing that I had left these folks with lots to think about. As I edge towards retirement I am constantly reminded of how much meaningful activity I create for myself and how many satisfying relationships I've invested in over the years. Perhaps that's why outright retirement continues to feel like something I have little interest in. My life doesn't feel like work but feels full, satisfying and adventurous. What a way to live!

How about you ...where's your life at in terms of your relationship quotient? Where are you in developing activities that leave you feeling fulfilled and gratified? If money has been your major focus, perhaps it's time to begin investing your energies a little differently. The rewards may be much more substantial in the long run.