I was chatting with a 50-something entrepreneurial man the other day who couldn't fathom that there are huge numbers of people who go to work every day absolutely hating their jobs, to say nothing of the even greater number who have become numb to work. For these numbed out employees, it isn't that their experience is especially awful, but at some point they gave up and are now quietly putting in their time while they wait for the blessed release that they believe will come with retirement.

I must admit that since Fred and I talked, I've found myself reflecting back on my decades in the corporate world, questioning my own memories of my work experiences, especially in the later years of my career when success abounded, when the money flowed and recognition was plentiful. I found myself wondering whether I had midjudged what a struggle the workplace felt like for me ...and then I remembered the sign that I'd hung up over my computer for the first couple of years of building my own business. It said "I can't take another day of this" and it was the statement that I made repeatedly to my husband for years before I finally took a generous buy-out package and ran!

That sign was a reminder for me when I had my moments of panic and uncertainty in this new world of independent business to not forget just how challenging I'd found it to work in a corporate context while remaining a real person with ethical standards. To remember that my frequent bouts of "I can't take another day of this" spoke to the frustration of puting my heart and soul into a project only to have it cancelled just as it was beginning to produce results because an organizational change had happened at senior levels and the new EVP had a different set of priorities; it spoke to 'having' to regularly be the messenger of such bad new to my staff while being creative in positioning the news so as to keep them motivated and willing to stay in the organization; it spoke to the politics, in-fighting and constant lobbying necessary with my peers to retain staffing levels, budgets and visibility with whoever currently mattered in the hierarchy.

That is a soul-destroying way to live, I discovered. And yet I know that the vast majority of North Americans live and work in these kinds of conditions: week after week, month after month, year after year, and decade after decade. No wonder retirement has come to feel like a wonderous mirage for so many. It is the image that floats lucsciously on the horizon ...a dazzling promise of the nourishment and refreshment to come. It keeps us going when our day-to-day existence seems so bleak.

And therein lies the sad paradoxical news for so many. Retirement as we tend to fantasize it is just that ...a mirage. Unless we take the time and energy to invest ourself in converting the glowing dream into some sort of practical reality for ourselves; unless we learn to build the skills that will allow us to live well in retirement it will remain just a mirage. A picture that represents the myth of the perpetual weekend!

The sad truth for many who have become deeply habituated to putting the true living of life on holid is that it will be a real struggle to rediscover the skill of actually living life. We will simply exchange the mind numbing process of going to work for the equally mind numbing retirement of sitting in front of the boob tube hour after hour, waiting for the occasional trip to the mail-box, coffee with the old gang or visit from our kids and grandkids to add some pizzazz to life.

Whew, I just a moment of panic at what my future could be ...and then I remembered that I stepped off that particular treadmill a decade ago and now live a full, vibrant and fulfilling life with no plans for 'retirement' on my horizon. Life is just too much fun and has too many interesting things in it for me to choose that path. What about you?